with me is nostalgia. several heavy boxes of nostalgia, that is - that i now must repack and load up into my kitty cat for a journey down the road. a resettlement into grander lodgings, if you must. i like to reflect on the good ol' days, but these reminders...it's as if they're an anchor and i'm some hapless mob snitch about to take a swim with the fishes. surely i'm a glutton for punishment, as i took a moment to reread some old journal entries. with some regret, reliving some of my thoughts have been painfully amusing as i cringe with both astonishment, laughter, anger and shame at some of my melodramatic thought processes as a gawky teenager and later, a naive college student. a lot of the events or things i did that i recorded in my journal i don't recall even happening, but i was a more prolific and copious writer back then. there was this guy i had a huge crush on but i don't recall ever talking to him. (well, i talked to him once over the phone, but it was excruciatingly lame). but according to my entries, i saw him several times and my sis even invited him to either my 16th or 17th birthday party, to which i wrote how he declined but later on apologized for not going. i don't remember this! i just thought he was impartial and indifferent to my existence , but he actually may have known my name, which was probably, cynthia's sister.
maybe i shouldn't take that trip down memory lane.
1 comment:
I've gone through the exact same thing. Sometimes I'm like, "What was I thinking?" Mmh... now I'm wondering which guy it was.
Post a Comment